Thursday, December 11, 2008

The worst week of my life

We went to Branson last weekend.

We really like Branson. We have some wonderful, kind friends that have a place there and invite us to come down often. We like it so much, we bought season passes to Silver Dollar City. We love having fun with our friends and doing fun stuff.

We like Branson so much we wanted to see how beautiful it was during the Christmas Season. The TV commercial says it is one of the top winter destinations. Boy, they weren't kidding. (spell check is telling me to spell weren't like this- wern't. I don't believe it. Am I wrong?)

So we went to Silver Dollar City, SDC for those of us on the inside, on Saturday. It was cold, about 45-50 during the day and colder at night, but we dressed warm. We got to the turn-off for the park and a nice man in an orange vest holding a SDC parking sign waved us on. On towards West Branson or Branson West, whatever. On toward Arkansas. We sailed past several more parking lots and nice men in orange vests directing us ever onward until at last we reached Arkansas. No really it was close to Arkansas. We were directed into a newly mowed field at the side of the highway next to a bank.

We should have known something was up then. Or maybe when we got out of our cars and had to wait in a line of about 150 people to get on a bus. But no, we just laughed and said "Boy, it must be really crowded." Ha Ha Ha.

Finally we were ushered onto a bus and as it was getting dark were deposited in front of the SDC gates. "Ha,Ha,Ha. Isn't this fun?" We said. Like fools. The next thing we know we see this sea of people trying to get in the park. We're not fools though, we quickly cut through a bakery and take a short cut. Unfortunately the short cut brings us out in the middle of another sea. This time it is the sea of people trying to get out of the park. It is a really, really big sea. And we are in the middle of it and we are going the wrong way. I am thinking we are going to end up like the guy at Walmart who got trampled. We have a small child with us. I am truly scared. When suddenly a very loud mouthed, I mean well meaning, SDC employee sees us trying to go the wrong way and starts hollering at us until we are pushed by a gang of unhappy outgoers into the side that is going in. Remember we have a small child with us. We are now pretty much separated from each other except for my lovely friend Tanya, who did manage to hold onto the small child. We finally get through the front gate and then inside to see a really, really, really big sea of people trying to get out of the park. Did I ever mention that I am claustraphobic? I am nearly in a panic by this time. We finally manage to group up again and someone has the presence of mind to lead us down a path to a spot where there aren't so many people. When we finally get to a spot where the people aren't arm to arm, I am shaking like a leaf, broke out in a sweat and ready to go home. Except now we are trapped in this park.

Well it got better after that. I truly had never seen anything like that in my whole life. Everywhere we went the lines were long but mostly well behaved. We visited lots of shops, rode the train, and watched a parade.

When we got hungry we ate a blooming onion and a philly cheesesteak sandwhich. We had a fairly good time until it was time to go home and then we had to wait in line for an hour and a half to catch a bus back to our field. At that time it was REALLY COLD.

But we made it home. Safe and sound. We were cold, tired and I had developed a nervous tic. We put on our jammies and I slammed two rum and cokes to settle my jangled nerves.

Finally everything settled down and we went to bed. Now here's the best part of the story and hasn't it been good so far?

At five A.M. I awoke with a battle of gigantic proportions going on in my stomach. It seems the 2 rum and cokes, the blooming onion, the philly cheesesteak and some chili I ate the day before were all having a knock-down drag out fight. There could only be one loser in this fight.

Welcome gastroenteritis, otherwise known as the stomach flu. It won't kill you, just make you want to die.

I will spare you the gory details, suffice it to say that when we reached home that evening, everyone was glad to get out of the car. Oh, and there was a lot of laundry.

So that was the beginning of the worst week of my life. On Monday I stayed in bed and bowed down to the plastic trash can. On Tuesday I felt a little better but weak. Then I noticed I was starting to get a head cold. On Wednesday, I relapsed and back to bed, head in the trashcan. Now I had the stomach flu and a cold. Lucky me.

Today is Thursday. I am out of bed and even had a shower. Went to the grocery store even. Actually, I went to a very special ceremony this morning that I will blog about later and that was the ONLY thing that got my sorry ass out of bed.

I am five pounds lighter and still can eat nothing but gatorade. I did get some baby food bananas and ate them and I think they really helped my GI tract because I am feeling much better. Tomorrow it's strained bananas and yogurt with probiotics. I am a BIG fan of probiotics. And Omega 3 and 6 fatty acids. They are SO good for what ails you. Take them, take them, everyone.

Now I haven't written anything for almost 2 months. I wonder why I chose this to write about? I'm not sure but I was compelled to share it with you. I needed to talk about it. I needed to purge these feelings. Get it? PURGE. I crack myself up. Nancy, I wish you read this blog.


Terry said...

Sounds like you had food poisoning. Not gastrointestinitis. I had it once and it was hell. Glad you're writing. keep it up!

nancy said...

Of course I read your blog! Unfortunately, my sympathy for your sick tummy is completely overshadowed by my sudden desire for a rum&coke and big bowl of chili. Hope your feeling better.